The 2003 version of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre adheres to the pure and
simple slasher movie formula: Introduce a gaggle of sexy young people,
make vague gestures to distinguish them--Jessica Biel (Summer Catch)
wants to get married and doesn't like pot, so she's our moral compass--
then start hacking them to pieces one by one. The visual palette includes
grimy crucified dolls, fly-specked pig carcasses, body parts floating in
murky jars, a tobacco-chewing redneck sheriff, and many slender beams of
sunlight cutting through dank, dusty interiors. The camera lovingly
photographs Biel's tank-topped bosom and sculpted abs as she's running in
terror from a bloated, chainsaw-wielding, human-skin-wearing maniac. This
remake lacks the macabre comedy of the original; it's all about the
nauseating sensation of waiting for something to jump out of the dark. Also
featuring Eric Balfour (Six Feet Under) and R. Lee Ermey (Full Metal Jacket,
Mail Call).